Reality Check

 

 

Misconception         
Victims must like the abuse or else they wouldn’t put up with it.

Reality           
People stay in abusive relationships for many different reasons (e.g., fear of abuser’s reaction if the relationship is ended, feeling guilty about ending the relationship, fear of being alone, abuser is at times very nice and seems to have changed his/her ways).  None of these reasons include liking the abuse.


Misconception          
Teen relationships are just  “puppy love” and should not be taken seriously.

Reality        
Teen relationships can experience similar problems as adult relationships, such as relationship abuse.  In fact, girls ages 16-24 are at a higher risk of experiencing relationship abuse than older women. Relationship patterns established as teens are often continued in adulthood.


Misconception         
Guys cannot be abused, and if they are, they’re wimps.

Reality           
Both guys and girls can be perpetrators of abuse, and victims of abuse. Remember, abuse is about power and control, and happens in many different ways. It’s not about who is bigger or stronger.


Misconception          
My boyfriend/girlfriend just acts this way because he/she loves me so much. Jealousy and possessiveness is just part of being in love.

Reality         
Jealousy and possessiveness is about power and control, not love.  A strong and loving relationship is based on mutual respect, trust, and maintaining individuality.


Misconception           
People who are abusive are just jerks.  I could never end up dating someone like that.

Reality       
Many abusers can be likeable, have a lot of friends, and may even be very charming.  Often their abusive behaviors are only targeted toward their dating partner, and do not begin to show until later in the  relationship.  


 

Abuse can happen to anyone - Awareness is the key to prevention!